Words, words, words ...

So They Say It's My Birthday

2008-07-14T14:32:49Z

It crept up on me this year. Number thirty-seven.

My big present is a new clutch for my Jeep — the old one gave out last week. I guess that HDTV will wait until Christmas ...

Blockbusters

2008-07-11T22:58:55Z

A meme from greeneyes_rpi.

These are the 25 all-time box-office hits according to IMDB.
Bold the ones you first saw in the theater.
Italicize the ones you saw some other way.
Leave alone the ones you haven't seen.

Titanic (1997) $600,779,824
Star Wars (1977) $460,935,665
Shrek 2 (2004) $436,471,036
E.T.: The Extra-Terrestrial (1982) $434,949,459
Star Wars: Episode I: The Phantom Menace (1999) $431,065,444
Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest (2006) $423,032,628
Spider-Man (2002) $403,706,375
Star Wars: Episode III: Revenge of the Sith (2005) $380,262,555
The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (2003) $377,019,252
Spider-Man 2 (2004) $373,377,893
The Passion of the Christ (2004) $370,270,943
Jurassic Park (1993) $356,784,000
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers (2002) $340,478,898
Finding Nemo (2003) $339,714,367
Spider-Man 3 (2007) $336,530,303
Forrest Gump (1994) $329,691,196
The Lion King (1994) $328,423,001
Shrek the Third (2007) $320,706,665
Transformers (2007) $318,759,914
Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone (2001) $317,557,891
The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001) $313,837,577
Iron Man (2008) $311,708,133
Star Wars: Episode II: Attack of the Clones (2002) $310,675,583
Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End (2007) $309,404,152
Star Wars: Episode VI: Return of the Jedi (1983) $309,125,40

I saw 23 of these in the theater, and two not at all.

Word

2008-07-07T17:20:43Z

A meme from auspeople.

Reply to each prompt with just one word.

Your cell phone? Idle
Your significant other? Radiant
Your hair? Tousled
Your mother? Organized
Your father? Retired
Your favorite thing? Playing
Your dream last night? Disjointed
Your favorite drink? Guinness
Your dream/goal? Contentment
The room you're in? Spacious
Your ex? Edifying
Your fear? Bereavement
Where do you want to be in 6 years? Traveling
Where were you last night? Recliner
What you're not? Lonely
Muffins? Blueberry
Something on your wish list? HDTV
Where you grew up? Montana
The last thing you did? Finished
What are you wearing? Casual
Your TV? Obsolete
Your pets? Cats
Your computer? Macbook
Your life? Rewarding
Your mood? Bemused
Missing someone? Temporarily
Your car? Jeep
Something you're not wearing? Necktie
Favorite store? Borders
Your summer? Hot
Like someone? Intensely
Your favorite color? Blue
Last time you laughed? Today
Last time you cried? June
Who will re-post this? Guess

Rare Achievements

2008-06-27T21:33:22Z

A meme from tfbretz, kcarp, auspeople, nicoleallee, la_directora, and others.

Three things I've done that people on my friends list probably haven't:

Crossed the equator at sea.
Held a Top Secret security clearance.
Rode an elephant.
Rode a camel.
Fell off of a camel.

If I'm wrong, let me know and I'll think of something new.

(Updated.¹ greeneyes_rpi is also an elephant rider.)
(Updated.² kcarp spends too much time in zoos.)

Seven Songs

2008-06-17T17:37:39Z

A meme from tfbretz.

Seven songs that resonate with me just now, without regard for style, genre, or quality:

Bob Dylan, "All Along the Watchtower"
Tori Amos, "Big Wheel"
David Bowie, "Golden Years"
Moby, "Extreme Ways"
Colbie Caillat, "Bubbly"
AC/DC, "Hard as a Rock"
Linkin Park, "Bleed It Out"

What about you?

Q&A

2008-06-11T06:27:55Z

A meme from auspeople, kcarp, la_directora, nicoleallee, ciaracat, and others.

1. What were you doing ten years ago?

Finishing a 6-month cryptology course in Pensacola, preparing for my direct-support tour in Japan.

2. What five things are on your to-do list for today/tomorrow?

Kiss my wife
Play with our son
Finish a book
Write a letter
Re-brand a Fortune 500 company

3. List some snacks you enjoy.

Reese's miniature peanut-butter cups
Ritz crackers and Easy Cheese
Tortilla chips and guacamole
Pineapple
Donuts

4. What would you do with a billion dollars?

Pay off the debts of everyone I know.
Move to Seattle.
Buy a house with a basement.
Live in Paris for a year.
Start a publishing company.

5. List the places you've lived.

Great Falls, Montana
Houston, Texas
Ayer, Massachusetts
Pensacola, Florida
Wahiawa, Hawaii
Misawa, Japan

6. List the jobs you've had.

Lifeguard and swimming teacher
Sailor and cryptologist
Writer/editor/proofreader

7. List some people you want to know more about.

Someone who never responds to memes
Someone who's never posted to this journal before
Someone with a secret tattoo

Thunderstruck

2008-06-05T19:02:17Z

If Barack Obama were struck and killed by lightning on a golf course, thousands of people would immediately wonder how Hillary did it.

Oviprimacy

2008-06-02T22:51:57Z

The egg came first, not the chicken. This question is now closed to debate.

Brobdingnagian

2008-05-29T22:27:03Z

I'm tall. I sometimes joke about how I'm normal and most people are short, but that's just my inner smart-ass talking. At seventy-six inches, I figure I'm tall enough — but not abnormally so. Many of my peers are close to my height. So I'm at the upper end of normal, let's say. Only people taller than me are freakishly tall.

Earlier this week, in defiance of all laws of probability, I rode up to the office in an elevator full of grown men and women, not one of whom stood taller than my elbow. I felt strangely out of place. Unnaturally proportioned. Freakish, even. I still haven't quite shaken the impression.

I wonder if professional basketball players feel this way all the time.

Cyborg Monkeys!

2008-05-28T20:37:34Z

Mad science? You decide.

Dictum Online

2008-05-28T17:51:56Z

Language can be a little turbulent around new concepts, but the Internet has been around long enough for us to settle on a few standards:

The hyphen in e-mail is not optional. Stop using "email."
Like "mail," e-mail is a mass noun; it can be either singular or plural. You don't send and receive "e-mails" any more than you would "mails."
Internet and World Wide Web (or just Web) are proper nouns, always capitalized. But intranet and extranet are common nouns and lowercase.
As a prefix, web- doesn't need a hyphen or a capital W — website, webpage, webcam, and webcast are fine.
Online and offline are single words. So are hotspot and homepage. But screen saver and slide show are still two words each.
Login, logon, setup, startup, and backup are single words only as nouns or adjectives. As verbs, they have to be two words: log in, log on, set up, start up, and back up.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Kingdom of the Crystal Skull

2008-05-26T03:17:45Z

We saw the movie last night, and enjoyed it quite a bit. It's no Raiders of the Lost Ark, but that would have been too much to expect, really. I judge it about equal to The Last Crusade. Make of that what you will.

My main disappointment was that the plot revolved around alien visitors — I suppose they're as fine a pulp fiction trope as any, but I just don't think there's room in the Indy mythology for both an Old Testament God and psychic spacemen.

Also, the marketing hype about preserving the quality of Indiana Jones with traditional film and live-action effects was misleading to say the least. Kingdom of the Crystal Skull had almost as much CGI as a Pixar movie. I don't really mind about the effects; I just dislike being lied to.

And is it me, or was the big finish stolen from The Mummy 2?

On the upside, all of the leads gave flawless performances, and it was really great seeing Karen Allen again. Countless perfect touches from beginning to end added up to a very satisfying movie. I look forward to seeing it again — if not in the theater, then as soon as it's out on DVD.

Dictum Incorporated

2008-05-23T17:29:24Z

If a company name ends in Limited or Incorporated, it doesn't need a comma — Options Ltd. and Murder Inc. are perfectly correct. If you insist on having a comma, however, there has to be another one after the name if the sentence goes on. Options, Ltd., may look awkward, but that's the price you pay.

Schrödinger's Pizza

2008-05-22T19:20:10Z

You know about Schrödinger's Cat. It's the thought experiment that physicist Erwin Schrödinger used to illustrate what he saw as the absurdity of quantum superposition. Basically, you have a cat sealed inside a box along with a poison that will or won't be released depending on the state of a subatomic particle. Because the particle exists in all possible states until you measure it, the cat is both alive and dead until you open the box to see for yourself.

(And by now you're thinking, "yeah, we know, what's your point?")

Years ago, in college, my friends and I ordered two pizzas: one pepperoni, one sausage. But Mr. Gatti's confused the order, so the delivery guy showed up with just the one box. Being college guys and too clever by half, we decided that this must be Schrödinger's Pizza — pepperoni and sausage simultaneously, at least until we opened the box and found out one way or the other. Naturally, it turned out to be both.

Anyway, this is why I sometimes call a two-topping sausage and pepperoni pizza a Schrödinger's Pizza.

Capital Dictum

2008-05-21T15:58:06Z

Admittedly, the rules for capitalizing titles and headlines are arbitrary and arcane. They differ from one style manual to the next. But if you are (or claim to be) a professionally edited publication, you need to pick a standard and stick to it. Me, I prefer the Chicago Manual, but these rules are generally relevant in any style:

Always capitalize the first and last word, no matter what.
Capitalize all key words (nouns, pronouns, verbs, adjectives, adverbs).
Lowercase articles (the, a, an).
Lowercase prepositions (but not adverbs — know the difference).
Lowercase these conjunctions: and, but, or, nor, for.
Lowercase to and as, in any function.

Of course, there are pages full of examples, exceptions, and special cases. And if you really don't care, that's fine. Capitalize every word if you must. Consistency is all I ask.

Eyes Front

2008-05-15T14:08:19Z

I'm no more lecherous than the next man, but I am a compulsive reader. Ladies, if you wear a T-shirt with something written on it, I can't help looking. No fair taking offense.

This goes double for pants.

Baby Titan

2008-05-14T22:35:02Z

My son had his two-year checkup yesterday. He's above the 97th percentile in both height and weight. He's already wearing clothes sized for four- and five-year-olds. Dear gods, I'm eventually going to have to look up at my own kid, aren't I?

Q&A

2008-05-13T16:54:37Z

A meme from auspeople.

Do you have a best friend who knows you inside and out? Yes.
Have you ever been punched by a member of the opposite sex? Not seriously.
Do you like Coke? Especially with rum.
Have you ever kissed someone whose name started with a D? Every day.
What color are the walls in your room? Mud.
Who is your favorite comedian? George Carlin.
Good face & bad body or bad face & good body? Whatever. It's what's inside that counts.
Are you falling for anyone? The deed is done.
Can you cook things more complex than spaghetti, pancakes, and macaroni? When required.
If your phone rings at 4:00 in the morning, who would you expect it to be? A parent or in-law.
Can you play guitar hero? Never tried it.
Are you addicted to MySpace? Never tried it.
What do you hear right this minute? Natasha Bedingfield, "Unwritten."
Have you ever dated anyone longer than a year? Yes. I've been married almost five years.
What made you happy today? Playing with my son.
How many times have you flown on a airplane? More than 50, less than 100.
What's your favorite candy bar? Twix, Kit-Kat, or Reese's.
Who was the last friend at your house? Taeri.
What do you think about the current gas prices? Poetic justice.
What were you doing an hour ago? Visiting the pediatrician for my son's 2-year checkup.
What's the closest blue object to you? My pants.
Have you ever been in trouble with the police? Yes.
Where will you be in an hour? On my way in to work.
When was the last time you worked and where? 5:30 yesterday. Adcetera.
When you eat Starbursts, do you eat the red and pink ones first? I don't like Starbursts much — not since I lost two teeth in one pack when I was ten.
Do you tend to think with your heart or with your head? Both.
What was the WORST thing that happened to you today? Holding my son down for his shots.
What's one fact about the person you like? She's adorable. Everyone thinks so.
Who took your profile picture? Not a clue.
Have you ever slept in someone else's bed? Not recently.
Do you know a lot about cars? Probably less than I should.
What is your favorite childhood board game? Risk.
Do you change best friends a lot? No.
Why did your parents give you the name you have? They thought it was distinctive but not too obscure.
Have you ever gotten into a drunken fight? I never started one, but yes.
Are you looking forward to anything today? Coming home after work.
What kind of grades did you usually get in school? Pretty much the whole alphabet.
What are your plans for the future? Live. Learn. Grow.
What’s your favorite type of beer? Shiner Bock and Guinness.
What did you do this Valentine's Day? Gazed adoringly into the eyes of my beautiful, loving wife.

Five Random Links

2008-05-08T16:02:12Z

Five things that have made my week a little lighter.

What have you got?

Five Comic-Book Movies

2008-05-06T16:55:42Z

The wife and I saw Iron Man over the weekend. What can I say? It's a great way to start the summer blockbuster season. Don't miss it (and make sure you stay through the credits). It's definitely one of my five favorite comic-book movies.

Iron Man
Batman Begins
Spider-Man 2
X-Men 2
Hellboy

And two of these have sequels this summer! Life is good.

Bibliophile

2008-05-05T03:00:34Z

johnbrandon, kcarp, and demusetta revisited the booklist meme. I went back and updated this post instead. It's close enough to the same list. I've been making an effort to read classics more often, so there are more bold titles than there were before.

Mixed Metaphor

2008-04-30T20:33:20Z

I encountered a terrific mixed metaphor this afternoon:

"It's not rocket surgery."

Has anyone else heard a good one recently?

Bear Feet

2008-04-25T20:02:39Z

Check it out: Your shoes are bad for you.

My inner five-year-old feels vindicated.

Best Last Lines

2008-04-23T14:19:57Z

I figured I'd follow up yesterday's post with The 100 Best Last Lines from Novels, again according to the American Book Review. My favorite has to be The House at Pooh Corner (number 66). How about you?

Best First Lines

2008-04-22T15:32:02Z

Something I stumbled across this morning: The 100 Best First Lines from Novels, according to the American Book Review. I think my favorite is the one from David Copperfield (number 20). How about you?